Sunday, March 28, 2010

HOLY CRAP GIRLS...

So here's the deal in a nutshell: 

The hubby and I hardly ever argue.  And when we do it lasts about five minutes before one of us makes the other one laugh then we apologize for what we said/did and move on.  I am NOT saying we don't disagree on things or get mad but we genuinely like each other so we get over it.

But today? .............. Today I wanted to rip his face off... and I almost did...

We leave for Tennessee in 6 days and the house needs some deep cleaning.  I'll admit, yesterday was a pretty wasted Saturday considering that I started organizing the office and didn't get much further.  So I decided today would be different.  I decided to do what I do best and make a list, broke down by room, of everything that needs to be done.  I then asked the Denmeister if he would mind pitching in and helping me.  He said yes (which I know, I know, I'm lucky he'll even agree) but then the world fell apart. 

Call me crazy but I thought it made sense to go through the "to-do" list and decide who would do what.  That way things would be done in a logical order and we could just dive in.  As we went through the list I took on a majority of the chores right off the bat because, lets face it, I'm woman hear me roar. 

And when it came to the chores I hoped the hubby would step in on, he wanted to effing ARGUE that it didn't really need to be done....  which prompted this letter written to keep from literally scratching his eyeballs out of his skull:

I think this is bullshit.  There's a ton to be done before we go.  Your mentality is "well lets fly in and do it all" and that equals half the shit not being done.  You've already rolled your eyes at half the stuff on my list which means, if left to do it on your own, it sure as HELL wouldn't get done!

So, knowing the HUGE amount of things to be done and the limited time to do it - I figured it be EASIER to plan it out, decide who was doing what then tackle it.

Its also bullshit that I was only one room into the list and its very clear that 80% of the shit will be done by me.  I'm ok with that.  Most of the stuff I don't mind at all but it'd be nice if we could divide up the crap that sucks to do.

So you go on cleaning the vaccuum (true story - he dove in on a project to avoid the wrath - poor guy).  Maybe you'll grab the list and see which three things you agreed to do.  But at some pont you'll come to me and ask "So now what?"  And thats when I'll tell you that if we'd just gone through the list together in the first place - I wouldn't have to stop what the hell I'm doing to answer you.

Or.... even better... you'll NOT come to me.  You'll just go through the house doing random things in an unorganized order and I will want to rip your face off.

No nooky for you tonight... (lie lie lie)

I'd REALLY like to say "Fuck the house.  I want to lay on the couch and watch a movie.  Let your mom see how disgusting this house is (she's watching the dogs), because you suck at life."  But I won't.  I'll just keep being pissed inside my HEAD and let it go.  Sounds like SOMEONE I know! (Hubby is painfully passive at times.)  Then you'll make me laugh and it'll be over.  Ahhh... the joy of being your wife....

So there's a glimpse into the world I live in.  It pretty much spiraled downward all day long.  And you know what happens next?  I'll inevitably start my period tomorrow and validate the fact that he's probably dismissing my screaming as part of the crimson tide.  And after that there's no maintaining that it was genuinely necessary to be a heinous bitch today.  All I have to say is I bet he's looking forward to that 10 hour car ride on Friday :)  Mwahahahahahaha!!!!

4 comments:

  1. ah, well...is he right?
    don't throw anything.'
    You can call me anal retentive when my mil is coming for a visit...so if dusting the baseboards and vacuuming the window sills is on there he may be right.
    If it's 'get the big pile of crap you put in the corner of the upstairs bedroom put into some semblance of order...then your right.
    Have a great night you two. lol.

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  2. Girl. Lesson #1 of marriage- NEVER EVER ask them what chores they want to do. They will take the easiest ones and be done. This is why you just say, "Can you do me a favor? Can you do _________? Thank you bunches!" And then you have to give lots of praise, just like you would when a toddler makes poopy in potty. ;)

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  3. Cmoursler - You caught me... I totally had cleaning the baseboards on the list... AND vacuuming the window sills. But I swear its because it NEEDS to be done, MIL or no MIL. For real... :)

    Sara - I totally concur. Except... I use the favor line ALL THE TIME. So I figured I was a) out of favors and b) it was time I stopped sugar coating it and time he stepped up a notch for this particular cleaning expedition. **Sigh** Needless to say he came around even though I was FUMING inside and I am EXHAUSTED today.

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  4. I have no good comments for you here. I am divorced. All I can say is hang in there. It has to get better:-)

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