Friday, June 24, 2011

WOOT! WOOT! HOLLA!! She's ALIVE!

Hey everyone!

I hope your summers are off to a great start.  Mine has been chock full of craziness but thats to be expected right?

Anyway I wanted to bring you all in on a new blog I just started about my recent couponing experience.  Even if you think "Screw that there's no way I'm going to be those ladies with 900 tubes of toothpaste and 2000 toothbrushes" I encourage you to come take a look - www.clippininthemitten.blogspot.com.  Join me loves!

Its interesting to say the least.  I hope you'll check it out over there.  I'd truly truly appreciate the support of my existing blogger girls :)

Also - if you know anyone considering couponing or who just wants to know what the heck its all about please send them my way.  I've only been couponing for about a month so I'm literally sharing this experience from start to finish and so far so good.  I'm kind of a couponing natural rockstar if I do say so myself. 

Later yall!

Monday, June 13, 2011

JUST A THOUGHT...

Its been awhile friends and while I can't make any promises for the next post I had to get this off my chest... Just a little thought about the way people are...

If you have to proclaim to be a good person, mother, wife, etc in order to refute a claim someone has made about you then chances are you need to look in the mirror and reevaluate.

With all of the social outlets, Facebook in particular, I'm constantly reading someone state how good of a mom they are or how awesome of a wife they are and its SO BLATANTLY OBVIOUS that their need to announce these things comes from the need to counter someone's opinion of them. 

If you are a good person, a good mother or a good wife then its who you are.  You exude that.  You exude it to the point that people who just meet you can tell what a good person you are.  You exude it to the point that no one would ever in their right mind question your character.  And its something that is so innate that you don't even recognize it because its simply your nature.

So again, if  you have to make such claims then chances are the opposite is true or at least partially true.  I have learned and continue to learn this lesson myself.  I caught myself trying to convince my husband that I'm a good wife. I'd do this or that and say "See?  I'm a good wife."  And I realize that that is bred from uncertainty.  I AM NOT innately domestic.   So it takes conscious effort to do things that a "good" wife might do.  Little things that probably come natural to most of you don't come natural to me - cooking, cleaning, etc.  And its not that I'm lazy its that I fill my time with other things (primarily over-committing to helping other people) while neglecting those things a good "wife" and someday mother would do.  But rather than make proclamations that don't hold their weight I realized I needed to sit back quietly and harness those skills.  Practice makes perfect right?  And all I do is cross my fingers and hope that over time the domestic gene becomes more and more dominant and I can exude exactly what I hope to be - a good person, a good wife and a good mother. 

Perhaps the latter is the reason I'm hypersensitive to others making such ridiculous claims.  Or perhaps you just get sick of the b.s.  Either way its out of my head now and into the blogosphere :)

Hope everyone is having a fantastical summer! 

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

LORD MAKE ME A RAINBOW

::BIG HEFTY SIGH::

Ok everyone. Here it is. I'm digging deep to let you in on something very personal that has thrown me out of the stratosphere for quite some time. I'm not sure if I'm ready to write this and I'm not sure how to move forward and write funny or light-hearted posts after this. So please - bear with me if this blog gets a little choppy while I navigate.

Carlee is my moms cousin's daughter. I'm not sure what you call that branch of the family tree but it's family. Enough said. Though we've lived within a few hours of Carlee, her mom and her sister I haven't seen her since I was quite young and she was likely still a baby.

Mid-August of last year, at the age of 16, Carlee went missing. She stepped outside of the apartment she lived in with her mother to call a friend and never came back. As you can imagine this is a very, very long story with many many details. This is merely a recap.

Police insisted that Carlee was a runaway. For some time they ignored the pleas of Carlees mother to please treat this as a missing person case. Searches were held. A vigil was held. Balloons were sent up to heaven with the hope that God would hear the prayers and return Carlee safe and sound.

How we hoped that she was a runaway.

Tips were called in and received in various forms but unfortunately were fruitless. Then things took a horrific turn.

In early December, I believe, police investigated a lead involving an ex-boyfriend and friend
of Carlees. Within hours arrests were made and our worst fears were confirmed. These two monsters confessed to killing Carlee.

I will never EVER in my life forget the exact moment that I heard the news. I was driving to the bank after work. I was supposed to watch my niece and nephew that night. Having heard the news my brother called to relieve me of my duties knowing that once I heard I wouldn't be in any shape to watch them. He couldn't bare holding out on telling so he said "They found Carlee." At first I was ecstatic; imagining her returning home with some crazy story of where she'd been. But then it hit me like a ton of bricks. I knew what he'd tell me next wasn't what I'd been hoping and praying for. "ALIVE?!" I asked. (Is it possible to pray a million times in a second?) "No."

I don't know how I drove home.

Truth be told they had not actually found her. As I write this we still do not know where she is. Her mother has not been able to lay her baby girl to rest.

I know that there is no preparation possible for human ears to hear the gruesome details surrounding the ongoing trial. Numbness truly is Gods greatest gift at a time like this.

I cannot and will not go into the specifics of the case because there is no way on earth that I can write you anything factual without saturating it with emotion. I'd write for days.

A Facebook page was created by one of Carlees moms dearest friends and has been somewhat of a wailing wall for many of her friends and family. But what stands out the most? Are the pictures upon pictures posted by those who had the joy of knowing her. You can see that in her short 16 years Carlee experienced so much. Her face is a light in each and every photograph. Carlee was the sun, the moon and the stars to everyone who knew her. We did not know each other on earth but I know I'll be one of may standing in line to take in that infectious joy everyones talked about when I meet you in heaven. Until then we'll keep your spirit and memory alive by sharing in the stories told by the lucky ones you graced with your presence
every day that you were here. Lord make you a rainbow to shine down on all of us. Rest in peace.