Sunday, January 31, 2010


First I have to apologize for my absence (I KNOW my four followers cannot exist without my nonsense and I apologize to you and your families for any interruption of normalcy in your behavior as a result).

Oh lots has been going on in this little noggin these days. I've just been working every day on doing every thing in my power to make myself happy. And unfortunately that has meant saying a big "F U" to the treadmill for the last few days... Not proud, not proud...

But in place of the new lifestyle I had some really great little things that made me just as happy and giddy. And since I'm a compulsive list maker well, we shall list!

1) Pure Romance (aka Sex toy) party last Friday was a HIT!! We had about 20 women, good food, good drinks and HELLO! Some good unclean fun... flippin sweet. WARNING: The following may offend some readers... X-rated quote from the night "It feels like the first time because it IS the first time... in my DAMN BELLYBUTTON! How the hell do you honestly think its in my a** if I'm FACING you?!" (I recognize the complete inappropriateness of this comment but you HAD to be there)

2) Woke up to about 2 hours of alone time while the hubs went and played racquetteball. There were no plans so I had a couple of guilt-free hours to take inventory of the prior night's purchases, pick up the house and sit on the couch with a blank look on my face while trying to get motivated.

3) Proceeded to go to Target (NEED I say more?) and buy three of my favorite things to purchase: a DVD (Secret Life of Bees), a CD (Lady Antebellum) and a book (What to Expect Before You're Expecting). Hello self! What'd you do to deserve such fabulous treats? Oh and finished it off with a caramel macchiato from Starbucks (count THOSE calories).

4) Upon getting in the car MC Hammer's "Can't Touch This" was on the radio. I kid you not. How the hell can you NOT be happy?

5) I went and had lunch and visited with my mom. We watched The Secret Life of Bees and chatted and it was a blasty blast.

6) Had dinner with friends and their ultra cute baby then went and visited our one week old niece Lily who is absolutely beautiful.

And that was just Friday and Saturday. Today the hubs and I stayed home and just hung out. I did a little reading (mostly about prepping Psycho Uterus for Psycho Uterus Pregnancy), watched some Intervention (helllloooo guilty pleasure) and Facebooked it. Does it get any more relaxing than that? And now... drumroll... its one hour and counting until the Grammys. I'm not a huge tv fan but I do love me some good live performances.

I can't make an official decision yet but I'm thinking the direction of this little blog is about to change. I've been having (OMG DOG FART... CAN'T BREATHE... SKUNKY EGGS IN MY NOSE...) a difficult time coming up with material that motivates me to write. Behind this recent undertaking of a better lifestyle lies a bigger driving force. And I think it JUST might ring stronger and more true to those of you reading this little rant more so than the random shiz I pull out on a weekly basis. So sit tight... I've got a bit more creative thinking to do but I think some positive changes are in the works.

Hope you all have a fabulous week. Make a goal for this week to do at least one small thing for yourself each day... something small that brings a guilty smile to your face.


  1. My neighbor just went to a sex toy party . . . with her mom. Now, I'm all for good lube, vibrating bullets, and anal jokes. BUT NOT WITH MY MOTHER. That just may have cured me from wanting to have sex forever.

    I love your ramblings. I do. Write more please.

  2. Haha! My mom came to mine last year. It was awkward but hilarious. I do solemnly swear to write more goods. Have a great week!

  3. just found your blog
    think its pretty great

    loving this post :)

  4. YOU, girl, are absolutely hilarious. I have never met anyone (other than myself) who uses the word "giddy." I <3 it. And now I <3 you. Do you know what my guilty pleasure was this past week? I used the new Rabbit dildo my hubby got me for Christmas (sweet, yeah?)before I rolled out of bed to feed my kiddos. Shhh, don't tell. ;)